Coaching Tools 101 – Unlocking Your Clients – 5 Essential Strategies You Must Try First!

Feeling stuck is an unpleasant experience for most of us. Too often we confuse FEELING stuck with BEING stagnant; if we FEEL stuck, it must be true! And the more we get stuck, the more we believe it, which affects our self-esteem and any belief in ourselves that we can solve this problem and break free. A true vicious cycle!

Well, there are many, many ways to help your clients get unstuck and move. Here are 5 essential strategies to share when your customers are stuck:

1) CHECK THE GOAL: When you have a stuck customer, this is the first place to start. Is it necessary to change the goal posts? Do they need to be taller, wider, in a different place? Should they shoot a hoop, not a goal? We’re talking about Goal ‘Ecology’ – ensuring that the goal is aligned with our client’s values ​​AND that there are no unexpected negative side effects to achieving your goal. Our subconscious often realizes that a goal is inappropriate long before we do and this can hinder our progress. So it is essential to ask yourself first, “Why do they want the goal?” and “What are the results you are looking for?” Then verify that the goal fits the client’s deepest lifestyle, relationships, and values. Look for unexpected results, now and in the future. If it’s an old goal, make sure it’s still valid for who you are now. And last but not least, check that it is your goal and not someone else’s …

REFRAME: Is the goal really RIGHT for them?

2) GIVE THEM NEW PERSPECTIVES: How could they achieve the same in a different way? What is the bigger picture? What options have you not thought about yet? New perspectives means taking the client out of fixed or black-and-white thinking about the problem, and involves good brainstorming and questioning skills that lead to the identification of new possibilities. Ask them to go crazy, outrageous, and think of absolutely impossible options alongside the “normal” brainstorming fee! Have them make huge lists of ideas and activate their creative right brain.

REFRAME: Think of the possibility, not the probability.

3) JUST TAKE ACTION, ANY ACTION: Doing something, anything, always gives our clients more information than they had before, even if it clarifies what they should NOT do! This may even mean taking action in an area completely foreign to your life. A change in the “situation” of your life can give you a new perspective and, therefore, a new light on your problem. The “Build a Bridge” training exercise is also helpful: they don’t need to be able to see the other side of the bridge; they only need to take the first 3 steps. Once they have taken them, they will be able to see the next 3 steps and so on, until they have crossed the bridge!

REFRAME: Do something, anything!

4) STRENGTHEN YOUR INTERNAL RESOURCES: Really support and encourage your customer. Actively demonstrate an absolute and unquestionable belief that you can find your own answers. And just like in therapy, it is incredibly important that your client really feels witnessed in his current situation, that someone sees him, accepts him for who he is, and is willing to move on with him from his current perspective.

REFRAME: Who do you need to BE to achieve your goal / take off?

5) UNLIMITED BELIEFS: Often times, what keeps people stuck is a limiting belief about what is possible or what they deserve and are capable of doing. Of course, one definition of a belief is, “Something we consider true, without any proof …” And limiting beliefs can range from specific ones like “I don’t have enough money” to more general and insidious beliefs. like, “I’m worth nothing” or “I’m not worth it.” As a coach, this is one of our main roles: listening carefully and observing so that we can help our clients identify and overcome their limiting beliefs. Ask, “Where are you getting in your own way?” and for fun, “What would you do if you DON’T want to achieve this goal / want to get stuck?”

REFRAME: If there is no proof that this belief is true, why not choose a positive or expansive belief rather than a limiting one?

Of course, there are many more strategies and variations available to you, but whatever happens, give your client endless patience and encouragement and gently remind them often that there are very few impossible goals, only impossible timescales. They ‘I’ll get there.