My wife wants a separation! How to put your marriage back together

Your wife wants a separation. The words felt like a blow to your heart and body. The woman you adore, the only woman you’ve ever built your life on, now she’s decided she doesn’t want to be your wife anymore. She wants out and she wants it to happen very soon. It’s understandable why you feel numb and insecure after hearing her tell you this. Your future that you thought would be filled with a lifetime of loving her is now filled with unanswered questions. You have to do something to change this situation now. If you don’t, that separation that she seeks will turn into a divorce and she will leave your life forever.

When your wife wants a separation, burying your head in the sand or in the past isn’t going to help. You cannot ignore this and expect it to be a passing mood and to improve. It is much more serious than that. Most women don’t make idle threats of wanting a breakup. For them it is a very serious decision that they have thought about a lot before even mentioning the idea. You have to take this as a sign of what it really is. Her wife is not happy with her relationship with you and she feels that the only way to solve the problem is to be away from you for a while.

The fact that his wife has suggested a separation and not a divorce is revealing. It means that she is not ready to pull the plug on the whole relationship yet. That gives you time to correct your mistakes and make her feel closer to you again. That starts by giving her what she needs right now, which may mean accepting a temporary separation so she can sort out her feelings.

Although it can be incredibly humiliating and painful, you should talk to your wife about why she feels this step is necessary. Don’t do this from a place of despair. Instead of her, calmly ask her if you can talk to her about why she feels separation is her only recourse. She’s likely to share some details about why she’s not happy, and they’ll mostly focus on you. Listen to what she says without jumping up to defend yourself. She will surprise you to know that there are things that take her away from you and that you can easily change.

Support your wife through this process and make sure she knows that you appreciate and love her. Continue to stay in touch once the two of you physically separate. Also, strive to become a better person and husband. If she sees that you’re striving to make real, positive changes, it will help guide her back to you. A separation can actually help you build a stronger relationship because you will both realize how much the other means to you.

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