Sometimes I hear from wives who are concerned about their husband’s behavior after he cheated on them or had an affair. Many wives sincerely hope for a husband who is willing to do whatever it takes to make things right again, but this is not always the case. Instead, many husbands will sulk, pout, or withdraw. Wives are often not sure how to react or what to do.

I heard from a wife who said, “I caught my husband having an affair a month ago. When I confronted him, he was very sad that I was spying on him and he tried to make me the villain of the situation. Once that didn’t work out, he very reluctantly agreed to end the affair and try to save our marriage, however, even though he has broken up with the other woman, he sulks around the house like a child who has been taken away from his favorite toy himself so he can go out and pout. He has not attended our children’s activities and sits in his home office and only goes out to eat or make phone calls. What can I do about it? And what does it mean? What does it mean when a husband isolates himself after an adventure?

Why Men Sometimes Isolate After Cheating Or Having An Affair: Many wives assume that the husband isolates himself as a means to retaliate or punish his wife for spying on or confronting her. This is not always the case. Some husbands isolate themselves because they are embarrassed or embarrassed. They are not sure how to act or what to say, so they prefer to walk away from an awkward situation. Other times, they don’t feel like they deserve to be around their family. They feel that their presence depresses everyone and causes more pain, so they tell themselves that they will save everyone trouble and fizzle out. Finally, sometimes they just want some time to recover before rejoining the family.

Is it harmful for a husband to isolate himself?: Could be. Some isolation of both husband and wife is to be expected in the initial stages after the affair. But if this is something that goes on for a long period of time, then it can be a problem, especially if she really wants to save her marriage. Because you can’t start rebuilding or move forward if you don’t have regular and open access to it. Both people need to be open and willing to interact regularly while you rebuild. If this does not happen, then recovery may be delayed or even delayed.

How to handle a husband who isolates himself after an affair: In the example above, the wife had pretty much let her husband isolate himself without comment. I suggested that he address this problem the next time it happened. Perhaps the next time the family has dinner, she could walk into her office and ask if she should serve him a plate. If she refuses to interact with the family, she might say something like, “I’ve noticed you’re isolating yourself from us. This isn’t doing either of us any good. I realize things are a little weird for us.” “. right now, but we’re going to have to interact if we want to save our family. I understand that this is uncomfortable for both of us and I am willing to take it one step at a time. But things are not going to get better if we don’t actively try every day. I’d like you to come have dinner with us. The children miss you and you are their father. They need your presence. Don’t punish them because of our problems. Let’s try to have a nice dinner and take it one step at a time.”

Another thing you can do is try not to make every encounter awkward or heavy. Of course, things are going to be difficult at times, but try to only discuss the painful topics of the affair when the two of you are alone. That way, her husband can feel safe to participate in family life without worrying that the affair will arise at any moment. It can be important to separate family life from the affair so that the family is not negatively affected by something that is definitely not their fault.