I had received an urgent call from my doctor
come immediately
You just received the results of the MRI.
and tissue sample biopsy.
I have been coughing a lot, the doctor and my wife say:
“You must quit smoking!”
I said “Doc, quit smoking?
“You got to be kidding!
To which the doctor replied: “Smoking is a deadly habit.”
“You said you could handle it, so go ahead and quit.”
My response was: “I can cut down on cigarettes, but I can’t stop.
I can’t do without it! ”
Yes, yes, I know it’s a deadly habit.
But I’ll keep buying my cigarettes
until it leaves me broke
it does not matter the price
I won’t think twice
Nicotine makes me a little sick
Said I could handle it but I still can’t give up
I lack the strength, the power to resist it! ”
It all started with a couple of long tokes
then the cigarette habit got the better of me,
You know, the stresses of the day
frustrations with people, the urge took over! “
Sure when I was fourteen and full of spirit
the tuxedo made me look cool and tough and manly
Now, forty years later, nicotine addiction
it has become toxic, expensive and ugly
I know the more I smoke my lungs will break down
So I guess I won’t live to see another birthday.
That damn nicotine!
Not only my body yearns for it
But I can’t stop thinking about it!
I’ve done all that I can do
believe it or not it’s true
So getting rid of this addiction to smoking will not be easy for me.
because I have become a slave to this habit
That I know will send me to the grave.
Yeah it’s my choice, my body, to do what I please
and I know this will eventually lead to heart disease.
Somehow this may seem silly to you
So don’t worry about what I choose to do
It just doesn’t do any good
Why try to make an excuse?
Cutting back on tobacco will feel terrible
The excruciating side effects
I am always irritable, anxious and shaky.
Even my head is confused and crazy
I am no stranger to the miseries of addiction
which only adds to my present affliction
tobacco smoke makes my hair and clothes stink
I can’t even make a girl wink at me
I keep my lips closed because I hate showing my yellow teeth.
My wife says my breath smells and my skin stinks
She complains about the smell in the house and the walls feel tacky
Your persistent scolding is driving me crazy
So the doctor finally interrupted: “To begin, let me say:
At the risk of repetition ”
So I said, “Hey doctor, have you found
a cure for my sweet addiction? “
Responding, he said, “Billy, don’t be so sarcastic
Your condition is severely drastic
MRI results and tissue biopsy
has confirmed that you will soon die,
Here are the pictures that don’t lie.
You have advanced lung and throat cancer
and it’s metastasizing
It will end your life in a way
which is painfully agonizing
I’m sure your children have already witnessed
your panic from increased shortness of breath
caused by your indifference and recklessness
Hearing the news, I was stunned with disbelief.
Is this the only answer to my finding of relief?
My head started swimming
my forehead covered in cold sweat
I don’t know how long I was frozen
after hearing this sudden statement.
Then I said “Doc, that scared me, and when I’m scared
I need a cigarette
I got the shakes now, making me cough
And it’s choking me.
The Doctor added: “I warned you Billy,
and again
You refused to listen and you refused to bend
You argue against everything I have to say
Just to prove a point in getting away with it.
I looked at it and without a word
I walked out the door
I was just not in the mood
to hear something else
He said, “I’m going to die, I know.
I’ve pissed everyone off
So leaving my wife and kids alone
I guess they won’t miss me
I got into bed and had my usual nicotine attack.
shaking hands, I lit my cigarette
Taking a deep drag, I started to drown
Coughing and spitting blood is all I do
’til the day I croak
At that moment, my wife entered
all flushed and furious
With a burning fury, she seemed consumed
“Billy, are you deaf?”
“Didn’t you hear a word
what the doctor said
If you smoked, would you be dead?
Shut up woman, be real
it’s too late to change
what death has already sealed
I cover my head to cushion
the sound of coughing
Hoping the kids won’t listen to me
or are they around
Every breath gets harder
to take me
So scared to sleep
I feel awake at night.
I feel scared as I see
a stone with my name on it
It’s a nightmare, this unhealthy habit.
Every time I cough, there is excruciating pain
in my throat and lungs
injected with morphine; I am not aware
when death comes
I have lived too long;
come sweet death please finish
Death is the kind of ending that I can only understand.
Mockingly, says Death, “The delusional words of the defenseless,
it happened in my ears. ”
Nicotine, My Hunter, your bite has served Me well! “